Rewriting Sentences Without Transition Words
By kristen overman
editor and writing teacher.
When you start rewriting sentences in your manuscript, you might notice that your work is overstuffed with transition words like "then." These words often function as filler, so it pays to cut them down when you’re rewriting sentences in your project. This lesson is more pertinent to some writers than others, and if you recognize yourself in this article, don’t despair—you are not the first or last writer dealing with this.
Rewriting Sentences to Omit Transition Words
Here’s a list of many transition words and phrases to look out for when you’re rewriting sentences in your creative work. Certain writers employ a lot of these words. "Then" and "Suddenly" and "Just as" frequently appear at the start of many paragraphs. While some writers don't have this problem, others use transition words to indicate the passage of time. They could benefit from rewriting sentences to avoid them.
Instead of introducing the action that's about to happen, describing actions is simpler when rewriting sentences to be tighter and cleaner. Generally speaking, transition words and phrases don't do much—they only take up space.
Action is typically written in chronological order, so words like “Then” are not required to link descriptions together. If your manuscript is too lengthy (60k+ for middle grade novel word count, 90k+ for YA, 100k+ for adult or literary fiction), you should examine each sentence closely to see if there's an overuse of transition words. Do they state the obvious? Could rewriting sentences be the key to whittling down your bloated word count as well?
Try cutting out some of these words and observe how rewriting sentences helps you become more concise and direct.
There Are a Few Exceptions to the Rule When You’re Rewriting Sentences
Although I recommend avoiding transition words, there are two situations where they come in handy. In writing a picture book, they help writing stay concise and keep younger readers interested. When hopping around timelines or transitioning between scenes, they can be helpful in keeping readers grounded, so they understand when and where something is happening in relation to a previous passage.
The main point is that writing works best when it is concise and purposeful. Writers should strive to do the work of rewriting sentences and cutting out filler words as much as possible. That being said, some flourishes are definitely fine, as they can help define one's writing style. Are transition words one of the things you can trim from your work? Now that you know, you can add them to your To Do list for rewriting sentences to be tighter and more impactful.
elevate your writing
Are you ready to take your story to the next level? Kristen Overman is here to help you! She's an experienced editor with expertise in middle grade and young adult fiction, picture books, adult fiction, and memoir. She can work with you to develop your plot, characters, and narrative voice, as well as assist in the brainstorming and outlining stages of your project.
